Category: Blog

The City Elders met in City Hall Chambers yesterday to discuss and to put into play a plan to replace the brand-new seats that were installed at the Center for Events.

Ever since their installation 4 years ago, the Center and the City have been blitzed with complaints about their small size and lack of leg room. Attendance at events has been in decline since. “The cost to remove the seats would be about $800,000 give or take a few $100,000”, stated Center Chief of Operations Larry Melville.

The plan on the boards is to remove all the seats and not replace them at all. “you can bring your own chair or blanket!”, said Olivia Meadows, Director of Marketing, Ticketing and Planner of Events. We will sell you the space and you can use it any way that makes you happy. We can sell you your space for multiple events. You would be, (giggle, giggle) a Season Space Holder! Or we can sell individual events. Of course, we will pick out the best space available for you either which way for a small convenience fee.”

Speculation is that concession stand revenues would increase with the removal of the seats. “People will actually be able to get to our stand and purchase things, stated Cookie Twain, Food Director.” People were blaming our high prices. People were blaming the fact we didn’t except credit cards. Those people just couldn’t get out of their seats! Things will change, you’ll see.” A small increase in concession stand prices is expected. “It will be a temporary convenience fee to help defer the cost of addition help that will be needed in the stand,” said Twain.” Plus, we are still trying to recoup the money spent on the credit card thingy update. That technology is expensive and complicated. I see now why it took over 10 years.”

More discussion by the Elders along with public hearings is expected along with a final decision in the next few months.

“It’s official. We are under a Winter Storm Warning”, stated Todd Schumpeter , Chief Honorary Meteorologist for Miss Manatee’s 5th grade class. “We are tasked with weather predictions this week by the National Weather Service. You can expect it to continue to snow for the next 48 to 72 hours. Accumulations could be as high as six feet. The winds will be breezy between 40 and 60 mph. This might cause some drifting.”

All city, county and state buildings and services are closed and or suspended until further notice. Essential services like the Police and Fire Departments will be tasked to the limits of their abilities please don’t call them.

Dave Stipplehorf, Superintendent of Highways and Byways requests that you stay off the roads. “Stay off the roads,” he stated. ” With this wind we are hoping that by keeping the roads as clear as possible the snow will have a chance to blow east and out of area of responsibility.” He also reminded citizens that when shoveling, their first priority is the cities sidewalks. Also do not to throw snow into the streets as this will hinder the blowing effect anticipated.

Schools will remain open. “We’re not going to waste not one valuable moment of education to a blizzard,” said Mary-Louse Philips-Finlen. “They’re future is in our hands.”

The Cities Recreation Service’s Department announced that all their facilities except the outdoor pools will remain open.

Further updates will be posted as needed.

 

 

 

 

 

This was the standard question at the dinner table presented by my youngest daughter, The Hoot as soon as she could talk. She couldn’t get enough about the antics of my dogs back in New York. Rusty made the trip to California when I relocated to be with Me Wife. Aye Dog had passed the year before but lived on in legend. She was the smartest dog since “Mr. Peabody” and she did laundry to boot. Rusty, the trusted sidekick could fold a fitted sheet and play gin rummy.

There were moments when I thought she had heard them all. She had. “Tell it one more time Daddy”. She would sit and listen, giggle and laugh. She made it seem like was I telling those for the first time. It was always and still is…. magical.

I hope not to lose that effect with TFTLC.

 

I’m currently sifting through the TFTLC archives on Facebook and have started resurrecting some of the favorites.

The Children – a small business dedicated to providing quality labor services on the backs of cute and adorable children.

Waning Days Senior Center News – The daily activity posting of a delightful Senior Center.

HOA News – follow the antics of our Revenue Generating Home Owners Association Police. Calculator and above average math skills required to keep track of “Fines Levied.”

CafeLuchy – each week we present a tongue tantalizing menu for you to drool over.

The FiveHole – stop in for the latest micro-brew, a shot of whiskey and kick back and enjoy some live music. 

Hey Gramps! – advice from an old and set in his ways self-inflicted know it all.

WurmHole Ranch – way on the outskirts of town there is place..

Your DailyOwl – will now have a new home and point of origin.

The Big White Evil Nemesis To The North – Oh Canada! We Stand On Guard For Thee!

Friends – the best stuff around comes from my intelligent and witty BFFs! Folks, feel free to post or offer up suggestions.

I will honor requests.

“Daddy tell us a story ………”

I’m going to write a Blog. I’ve been encouraged to do so by my wife and daughters. The thing is what to write about. I’ve been told to do what I do best, make up Shit and make it Believable Shit.

I can do that.

I looked over the original stuff that I have posted on Facebook the past few years. A lot of stuff and not all of it the same. I have spewed out quite the variety of nonsense under my own name and on pages I have created most notably “Thoughts from The LawnChair.” In the spirit of friendship and world peace I shall continue and share under that name.

 Wow! I now have a direction and a website to get in trouble with.

Stop back often as I update content, put air in the tires and get this puppy fine tuned and running.